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Showing posts from May, 2019

note

there are moments
i really wanna get lost
lost in the middle of nowhere
no connection...
yes, nothing...
just me and my shadow...
nothing to argue with..
nobody to please
i'm tired of all the drama.
tired even with myself.
just wanna lay in bed all my life
do nothing
just sleep.
but of course.
i know the answer there..
it's a battle to be fought.
i'll be just fine
let me give myself some time.

2231-M05082019

overthinker

0206-M05082019

don't show me a drop of uninterest
i might lose my will to reach out

yes, please don't discourage me
coz i might take it all my life

don't make me feel i'm worthless
i might not find my worth again

don't make me feel like i matter
when in the end you can't sustain

i might consider everyone else
as someone who'll take me forgranted.

don't start something with me
when you can't be there 'til the end

don' t joke around and make me believe
then tell me everything was just for fun

i might be so true to you
but promise i, too, get tired

especially when i felt that all my effort
was spent for nothing so important

don't mess with me without me knowing
because you'll be a mess for me 'til the end

don't ever dare to make me feel important
coz i might give you the value more than you deserve

never try to lie to me once
i might find out in the middle

but i'll never tell you i knew you lied
coz i will still deal with your stuff

but promise, i'…

unexpected little happy melody

The first time we met you do look so silent Yes, just that moment.
Meeting you was unexpected
but your laughter captured us
It's contagious even if it's not wanted. ✌🏻😊

I do remember you but i haven't got a clue that you'd be so true.

Sniffing my armpit in front of them
gave me a feeling i can't comprehend
good thing i wasn't sweating then. 
You talk so clear,  you seem got no fear and yes, you're so sincere.
You cross a busy traffic like you own the whole street and that looks so terrific.
Talking like we've known each other years before we've met here in this place with untold answers. 
Maybe we knew each other back then. 
Yes, before this world was, maybe we're really friends
and we planned to meet this time before this world ends. 

you always hug me (us) from nowhere
which at first is a little awkward
but you explained why and that struck me hard. 

You came seven months ago thinking of dif'rent plans to do not knowing what's in here through. 
Maybe, you just wa…

just a little

you made me feel a little stupid
like i don't know what i do

i don't know if you're just judgmental
or it's your intuition too.

but i am hoping i got it wrong
because it made me feel small

it seems like i don't know who i am
with the way you question me

i know you care so much like she did
i assume you really do

and of course, you can just let me know
i just hope the way she does

i know you know i'm tired of life too
so i hope you don't pull me

thank you for all of your reminders
but please, say it clearly

because i do understand one word
like what she has taught me then.

i don't want to feel so low these days
and yes, not because of you.

i'm glad she made me believe i can
before she left me for good

it's sad that i'm forgetting it now
because of the things i heard

maybe i'm wrong when i depended
with people i thought i should

i promise i will stop from now on
i will be fixing myself

i will make sure i will bear no grudge
i'll try my hardest just not to judge

bec…

too tired

i'm tired of my routine
too tired for what's required
it seems like this life i can't sustain

i don't know what i feel
'coz sometimes it feels surreal
but i wanna laugh it out for real

peopling often exhausts me
at times, i don' t wanna see
but being alone is of too much impossibility

i am here thinking deep
trying not to sleep
wishing for all these thoughts to just slip

i don't wanna move
even a muscle or two
no, not even my tongue too.

i know He's up for something
and i hope He' ll remove this thing
all this thoughts inside i'm battling

yes, i'm tired living for a dream
tired living for people without stream
too tired of composure when you really wanna scream

there is a cure in this, i know
but i still have to hold it in for now
i don't need to let it show

time will come that i'll tot'ly be fine
when all these thoughts won't be mine
maybe i just have to give it time.

for now, my only remedy is sleep
it's like saving myself from all the beeps
dodgin…